Wednesday, January 02, 2013

And I Begin Again

Talking to a dietitian will make me accountable to someone.
Tomorrow I'm going to a nutritionist. I was supposed to go last week, but cancelled because I thought my insurance wasn't going to pay for it. But then I found they were. So, I'm going this week. I've been keeping a food journal over the past week.

Has it been enlightening? Well, not really. I already knew most of my habits. But I guess the info will help in deciding how I'm going to approach my weight loss goals.

What I'm really looking for is accountability. If I'm accountable to someone besides myself, I have more success. I don't have much confidence in myself. Maybe it's because I've spent so many years not liking myself. Whatever the reason, it works better when someone else is calling the shots.

But on the note, I have spent a lot time thinking I have no control over my own life—and that is going to change this year. The messes that I'm in are there because I created them. The poor diet, lack of exercise, and obesity are of my own doing. Ok, I do have thyroid disease, and that accounts for a slow metabolism. But it doesn't account for how I've let myself go.

I look old and tired. Yes, I'm 54. But here's the thing. I'm not 64. And that's how I feel. Some days, I feel 74, 84, and, well, even dead. Although I'm not sure how you could feel dead. I don't think that would have much feeling. But I digress.

I know I can lose weight with a lot of hard work. Yes, I said hard work. Why does it have to be so hard? Why does anything have to be hard? I think the answer is that if everything were easy, with little or not challenge, then what would be the use of doing it? Having said that, I also know what will happen if I don't put in the hard work. (See Randy Glasbergen cartoon to the right.)

So, I guess, if you want to, you may join me in another effort to make my life into what it should be. So here I go. Taking this leap of faith—and least one more that I will be detailing soon. That's right, this isn't the leap of faith that I discussed earlier. However, this one is necessary to make other one even possible. Stay tuned. 

2 comments:

Erica Bentley said...

You can do it Kathy! Just keep at it and don't give up. :)

kathyj333 said...

Thanks Erica. I'm going to give this 110 percent.